


Buried At Sea

by muigiel



Category: Temeraire - Naomi Novik
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-25
Updated: 2015-05-25
Packaged: 2018-04-01 05:50:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,042
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4008241
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/muigiel/pseuds/muigiel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Everyone copes differently with the death of a friend.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Buried At Sea

**Author's Note:**

> This is my piece for the TemeraireExchange2015.

The sun had reached its zenith. Everyone was sweating in their finery. The wind was almost unnoticeable. The Allegiance rocked faintly in the shallow waves. Silence lay over the scene like a thick heavy blanket. Nothing was reminiscent of the storm that had ailed them for three days. They had been lucky, Captain Riley had said, smiling with relief, for the ship had barely taken any damage and not a single crew member had died.

He wasn’t smiling now. The only sound was his voice reading the service. Nothing was evocative of the storm but the body sewn in a hammock. There had been a very short argument on whether to use round-shot or iron shells as weights, since he wasn’t technically an aviator anymore. Granby had ended it with the words that had quickly become a mantra among the humans on board: “We mustn’t upset him.”

The strange thing was that Temeraire hadn’t been upset at all. After the wave had hit the dragondeck he had drawn the motionless man between his forelegs as if to protect him, and then slept on. And when the weather had cleared and he had been freed from his chains he had uncurled, revealing the body, and suggested to Granby that they may bury Laurence now.

 

~***~

 

There was no reason why she shouldn’t be crying. There was no reason to hide her tears. She was not ashamed of them. In some ways the Captain had been like a father for her. She wondered whether she had been something like a daughter to him.

She remembered what her mother had told her in the weeks after their victory over Bonaparte, about a conversation she’d had with Laurence about his father and the necklace sent to Emily by his mother. How they had laughed about Laurence’s etiquette that precluded him from clarifying the matter. Mother had then reminded her sternly that Laurence was still her superior and his manners those of a true gentleman, yet the smile had remained in her eyes.

Emily wondered whether her mother would cry when she heard the news.

 

~***~

 

God knew how many times he had told him. That he had to be careful. That he had to step back. That he was not only responsible for the lives of his crew, but also, more so for the happiness of his dragon.

Laurence had gone up to check on Temeraire’s chains. He had gone himself instead of sending someone else. He had gone alone instead of asking for help. He had gone and told them that he most likely wouldn’t come back but spend the rest of the storm with Temeraire. And the latter, showing remarkable resemblance with his companion, hadn’t said a word until the damned storm had ended ten hours later.

John stared straight ahead, forcing back the tears. ‘For God’s sake, Laurence,’ he thought. ‘I should have had an eye on you.’

 

~***~

 

He shifted and hoped that no one would notice. He was uncomfortable. He thought he should feel more than that. But in truth what he felt was mostly confusion. Should he be glad that Laurence had died while fulfilling his duty rather than by being hanged? Could he be thankful for not having a traitor on his ship anymore? Shouldn’t he be grieving the loss of his old friend? Had they still been friends? Had it been wrong to avoid him at all cost? Could he have forgiven treason? And if he’d had, wouldn’t that make him a traitor too?

He remembered how crestfallen Catherine had been when Lily had been sick. And with how much outrage she had told him in her letters about the government’s plan to ‘poison every dragon on the continent’. He imagined that many aviators had shared her feelings. Still he himself could not. He doubted that he would ever understand how they could love their dragons so much.

Right, the dragon. Temeraire. He dared to glimpse towards the dragondeck. Was he a danger to the ship? So far he had been rather quiet. Anyway the matter would have to wait until later.

 

~***~

 

It was rather simple. They had been sent to Terra Australis for committing treason. Laurence had only committed treason because he, Temeraire, had suggested it. Laurence was dead because of him. It was all very clear. Not that it made a difference.

It had its good sides, too. Iskierka hadn’t said a word besides making sure that Granby was alright. She also kept to her side of the deck. No one spoke to him. The crew put food in front of him, he never touched it, they took it away, or gave it to Iskierka, or threw it overboard; he didn’t care.

When he had last thought Laurence dead, there had been a culprit to take revenge on. An enemy to fight. This time there was nothing but the sea.

He wondered how long he could uphold the mask of calmness. He was aware that they were afraid of him. He was afraid of himself, too. Of the things, the deeds he had considered during the last hours of the storm, when Laurence had lain lifeless on the deck’s planks.

Forlorn. That was the word. Hopeless, lonely, abandoned. Where to go from here? Who could ever replace what he had lost? Why did Laurence have to die?

 

~***~

 

It would take them two or three weeks to reach Calcutta, he assumed. Going back was out of the question, now that the Lords had another reason to see Temeraire as far away from England as possible.

What next? He had already decided that he wouldn’t continue the voyage to New South Wales. He could find plenty of work in colonial India. But should he turn east or west? The thought of returning to England created only nausea. Perhaps it was about time to explore new grounds? Before the idea would have thrilled him. Now it seemed as dull as everything else.

He wondered how Temeraire imagined his future. There wouldn’t be much of it. The corps had enough heavyweights stationed in India to subdue him for execution.

The body hit the water with an undignified splash.

 

~***~

 

Tenzing left the ship when they made port in Calcutta.

They never saw him again.


End file.
